happy new year y'all...


hope 2004 is a decent year for those of you who are reading (and everyone else)

ok... a slightly more proper update methinks.

well.... christmas came and went...
im bored.. going to eds tomorrow...
um... thats about it really....
if i can ever get my scanner to work i might post some more pics lol

there ya go... you can have a pic of me...



thats what i look like lol...
well... im a bit older and more decrepid now lol...
but you can tell its me :)

w00t!
i can now do pictures!!!!

the problem was with where the pics were stored online.... not with me :)

yey..
now i can finally put up some pics.... hehe :)

ok im just testing this...


wonder if it will work....

The wise man said just walk this way
To the dawn of the light
The wind will blow into your face
As the years pass you by
Hear this voice from deep inside
It's the call of your heart
Close your eyes and your will find
The passage out of the dark

Here I am
Will you send me an angel
Here I am
In the land of the morning star

The wise man said just find your place
In the eye of the storm
Seek the roses along the way
Just beware of the thorns

Here I am
Will you send me an angel
Here I am
In the land of the morning star

The wise man said just raise your hand
And reach out for the spell
Find the door to the promised land
Just believe in yourself
Hear this voice from deep inside
It's the call of your heart
Close your eyes and your will find
The way out of the dark

Here I am
Will you send me an angel
Here I am
In the land of the morning star
Here I am
Will you send me an angel
Here I am
In the land of the morning star

so it seems i havent been on here for a while...
well, im not entirely sure what people want me to say in response to that.
i just want to stick my tongue out and blow a raspberry at you all.

im taking refuge at the moment. for how long? who knows. its going good so far. i currently have a house to myself (well kind of.. i think dan /is/ still here... but he's going before me im pretty sure) and it isnt for long, but its nice.

so there are some people out there who think ive either gone crazy or arent happy that i havent seen them for ages.......
well, im not crazy (well, no more than usual anyhow).
And the people who are talking about my absence.... i'd like to know where you were when it would have been nice to see you. some of you are too lazy to contact me- even if its just an email. ive seen people, ive done things, with the people that /do/ care, and that can be arsed to make an effort when i cant.
just to clarify, ive gotten a lot worse the last three-four weeks. and no, i havent told anyone about it, so even the people ive seen didnt know that, and i wouldnt have said, cause im tired of being pitied by some and scorned by others. there isnt anythign that can be done so im not gonna subject myself to a hospital when they cant do anything till they get the test results theyre doing back.

i got half of the latest blood test back. they tested my anaemia, which is falling all the time by the looks of the last few times, so im on iron for the next three months at least. three times a day. my desk now looks like a pharmacetical cabinet it has so many things on it. when the other half come back i could be taking 4 or 5 tablets three times a day. i dont think id ever taken 5 tablets full stop before this.
im not starting anything till jan1 tho.

ill stop ranting, other than to say im not shunning the world and if people want to visit they can. im sure something can be sorted out.

im looking forwards to going to ireland in a few weeks. speaking of that i need to see if im still going to scotland in february... then ill have been to every country in the UK.

i lost my mp3 cd player on saturday. im really pissed off cause it was only a month or so old, and worked brilliantly and i purposely didnt get a cheap one. i rang people to see if they have it and they dont. im gonna ring the bus people as a last ditch attempt to see if it was picked up by them.
im pretty certain its not in the house- ive tidied my room and things have been moved and stuff....
ive also lost my scart lead, tho that isnt quite as big a deal.
luckily i only had an mp3 cd in it... so notjhing lost there...

anyhow.
enough from me.

sorry to anyone who keeps checking for a post..

well... in being spontaneous ive booked myself a day trip in january - to dublin!
travel has cost me £2 for flights... :D
gotta love ryanair for that!

so yeah.. a day in dublin.

scotland left to go now.... have done wales, and am doing ireland... just scotland left now.
anyhow.
gonna try sleep again now..

sara

oh, and um. i own both bill and ted films now... :)
party on dudes!

i dunno what it is about the last week or so... but everything ive come across; seen on tv, film, random things ive read etc has had angels in (im not counting 'touched by an angel' [tv show on hallmark] here... cause that blatantly is and i watch it most days) its getting to the point where its almost weird now...
even x-men evolution- like what?!?! and had a couple of dreams with angels in, tho thats probably a product and not a source. most of them have had similar themes too, and nothing to do with christmas at all... its just an interesting observation. weird too... a lot of coinciding going on... im not sure what to make of it to be honest..
any comments? lol

just had quite an interesting lecture on 'the matrix' and what the allusions /character references are with regards to the ideology contained within the first of the trilogy. very interesting.
looked at the elements of christianity, buddhism, greek mythology, eastern tradition amongst other things...
didnt touch on gnosticism at all, which could have been good for discussion but that wasnt too bad.

gonna go home and lay down for a bit this afternoon cause my achilles tendons are playing up a bit and i wanna give them a rest.

also i need to get hold of a dehumidifier (went to price up the other day and theyre 90 quid!) for a while, as my room has damp (as do other rooms) and its still making me ill, even though i rearranged my room so that i was sleeping away from it, so if theres one going cheap that anyone knows of or anyone would like to lend me one then please get in touch!

its been decided that im going to go home for christmas day and get home on boxing day means i get 2 nights of sleeping on a floor (or if i get my way then in my much more comfortable inflatable chair with the amusing quotes from abbie, tom, erica, het, myself, katie d, and the rest of the KC bunch) but i feel like i should go home...

not gonna write lots today cause my arm is hurting from yesterday and the nurse :S
tonight i have a christmas meal to attend, which will be nice to wind down on, but im also gonna do my essay.

oh, and the portfolios came back today... someone had seen one with 45 on it... i bet its mine... :S

will let you know if i ever collect it.

sara

where did the readership go???

hehe...... i think i just got boring to be honest.... :S

oh well...........

went back for yet more blood tests today... my theory that the medical profession are trying to kill me took another turn today...... the nurse told me a) i couldnt look at my own notes (scuse me?!?!) the only reason i wanted to look was to prove to her that i was meant to be having it and why because she b) accused me of lying about it pretty much (um... ever heard of reading hte notes before seeing your patient?) oh and c) which was the thing that shocked me most, was that she didnt swab my arm before inserting the needle.... now i dont think i have anything that will kill me, BUT- hygiene protocols are there for a reason surely?!?!?! oh and d) neglected to see if it had stopped bleeding before putting some tape over the cottonwool and sending me on my merry way- the tape wasnt long enough to secure the cottonwool, and it actually /hadnt/ stopped bleeding so i had to run home, applying direct pressure and find the plasters for when it had stopped .....

oh and she didnt know which bottles to put the blood to test inflammation markers in so she did one of every kind they had... and ticked full blood count on the sheet.....


i'd like to have some kind of faith in the medical profession- really, i would! but that... arg... still... im prepared for the worst now.

i got a head start on saving up to go away... 500 pounds. i was looking at ISA's the other day but i dont really understand it or the differences, and i couldnt find one that did wat i wanted it to... i reckon i should be able to scrimp and save another 500 at least before i graduate (more if i can get a job) meaning i have a grand to go away with... dependng on what i choose to do and where to go depends on how long... this is of course assuming ill be ok to fly, but hey....

i got my spoof song finished- hoping to record it soon- 'the sound of the (london) underground' need to find/make a backing track of the original (shouldnt be too hard id think :D )

im also working on my rearrangement of 'lean on me' gospel style. i came to a standstill with it a while ago, but my dad played me a version he's got by joe cocker complete with gospel choir which convinced me to finish it.... i find gospel is really easy to write... it'll be interesting to record... i have me on all female parts and hopefully chris will take the male parts... a 5 part choir - using 2 people.... im a bit disappointed that i was beaten to it, but what id already done is not near enough to be classed as copying...

still makes me wonder if ill ever be able to get my gospel choir together... i only need to take my grade 8 singing and a conductors exam to be qualified to have an official one... am gonna try and get hold of andrew again anyhow cause i would like to take my grade 8 (was ill on the exam before), diversified into show/blues which is perfect for gospel stuff, and the piano lessons im having would be good... i only need to be grade 5 on an accompanying instrument (have to be piano cause i am NOT takign grades on guitar) i think to be qualified for doing peripetetic teaching up to grade 5 so that would be good as a job....

that was the other dream job type thing i had, and its actually become the most realistic... even though i didnt get to do the BMus i wanted to.... it does kinda depend on getting back hold of andrew tho cause id need a) catch up lessons and b) most singing teachers would insist i did classical not any other banch and theyd also insist that i took grades 5 6 7 as well as 8.....

plus my grade 5 theory would be wasted if i didnt do at least /one/ practical past grade 5 and flute is out for two years i reckon... i wouldnt get back up to previous standard in any less time i dont think...

wow.. that was a vaguely decent length post from me....
cup of tea and mess around wiht the songs on the side after the gentle 'prompting' i recieved in the comments.... (lol) and stuff and maybe do a bit more on the infinitum site..... hoping to have it ready for launch early Jan...

sara

things are quite complicated right now..

am meeting joe c for coffee this evening. have wanted to catch up with him for a while...
im looking forwards to it.

i think im getting a bit too morbid- and coming from /me/ thats saying a lot... i know thats its just my head trying to screw with me but its quite draining to be analysing myself all the time.

i didnt get that much sleep last night either. was in pain for most of it... and then winamp stuck and woke me up

k. stuff to do. am outta here.

my lil trip i'd planned for tomorrow aint happening now,
which is okay... get to sleepin kind of in the morning.
i generally have to get up around 8am to stretch me legs which get cramp and end up downstairs watching
dr quinn medicine woman, quincy, providence, diagnosis murder and touched by an angel.

i love the hallmark channel!!!!!

INTJ - "Mastermind". Introverted intellectual with a preference for finding certainty. A builder of systems and the applier of theoretical models. 2.1% of total population.

Take Free Myers-Briggs Personality Test

I was INTJ last time i did this... but im totally borderline this time on 2 things so.....


Introverted (I) 73.33% Extroverted (E) 26.67%
Intuitive (N) 58.97% Sensing (S) 41.03%
Thinking (T) 50% Feeling (F) 50%
Perceiving (P) 50% Judging (J) 50%





make of it what you will

ive just been to see iron maiden-it was brilliant! even though i didnt know all of it, definately nothing off the latest album, i still really enjoyed it. am even tempted to find a cheap ticket on ebay to go again specifically to take some photos, cause the last few gigs ive been to, there wasnt much to see... this time there so was! just i didnt take my camera....
we'll see eh?

where did all my energy go?
yesterday i went to bed at 7pm. just got in this evening and im gonig to bed now (if my wrist stops spasming ever anyhow).

sure there was someting i was meant to be doing tonight or yesterday evening... now i jsut dont know.

big up to our favourite wil wheaton on his 'epic announcement- while i knew this yesterday when it was announced i couldnt get on blogger.... :S

so im posting now, instead :)

for more info then head here to see just how excited the young whippersnapper was upon spilling hte beans about his EPIC book deal!

just had an amazingly interesting lecture like... wow!!!!!

really good discussion on tension between christians and jews, and anti semitism in the bible and all kinds of funky stuff like that.... !

just killing a bit of time over lunch before heading up to ed's for a band practice.... it'll be interesting cause jack dont have any drums up there... but im up for the go... im feeling surprisingly energetic at the moment... which is wrong cause i didnt sleep last night. but what the hey.. im sure ill pay for it later!

so yeah... then ill call home for a bit and maybe call to the other home- the 'rents... we'll see tho.. cause ill prolyl be well tired by then. doing anything creative really takes it out of me nowadays... maybe im making the transition to scholar properly.. :S i dont mind not having any ideas... but doing something i always enjoy shouldnt knacker me out (well unless it was running up mountains...or something silly but cool like that...!) but yeah...

anyhow chums. must dash, as i want to catch the 12.58 to get there... wonder if cooky is out of his lecture yet...?

mm...

oh and would the dumpling thief please own up???


oh and next time people decide to have a game of age of empires and decide not to ask me... dont let me know youve done it.....
having sat in my room for 2 hours doing nothing and then finding that there was a game in progress..... thankx guys.

Lord of the Rings!


What movie Do you Belong in?(many different outcomes!)
brought to you by Quizilla

impressive.......





You're Most Like The Season Autumn ...

You're warm, and the most approachable. You have
that gentle prescence about you. People can
relate to you, and find you easy company.
However it's likely you've been hurt in the
past and it has left you scarred so things can
become rather chilly with you at times. Being
the third Season in, you're mature, trustworthy
and loyal to your friends but prone to
depression and negative thinking.

Well done... You're the shy and sensitive season :)


?? Which Season Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

Your element is Spirit. You are above most Earthly
things or like to think you are. More
mysterious than any of the other elements and
twice as dangerous. You tend to be a loner and
whatever you belive in it verges on fanatical.
Be careful because Spirit has no true substance
and can get lost.


What's your element
brought to you by Quizilla

You are naturally born with a gift, whether it be
poetry, writing or song. You love beauty and
creativity, and usually are highly intelligent.
Others view you as mysterious and dreamy, yet
also bold since you hold firm in your beliefs.


What Type of Soul Do You Have ?
brought to you by Quizilla

oooooh... quizzes... havent done any in a while...
thanks si!


You are a lipid. You know whom you like and whom
you hate, and you like hanging out with people
who think like you do. People who disagree with
you annoy you to no end. You either love
Abercrombie and Fitch or you despise it, but
there's no middle ground. You're polar.


Which Biological Molecule Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

hey y'all, well im at uni at the moment with a bit of time to kill so i figured id post.
well... whats happening?
ive managed to grow 2 nails...thats something right?
i watched 'Jesus of Montreal' yesterday- noone told me that it was in french however..... so that was interesting...
i actually understoo a fair bit of the french however which was interesting... :S ive not done french for 5 years....
anyhow
off now.
gbye

just said goodbye to abbie.

parting words to me " i hope everything turns out ok". sounds so final.
im happy for her, but im going to miss her like crazy. if i had the money and the lack of ties keeping me here id be gone down there with her, itd be cheaper to share a flat for certain.....
:(